5 reasons I love my cat;

1. When my cat purr’s its the most comforting thing, and it means I am home and he hasn’t forgotten about me.

2. When I kiss at my cat he bumps his head into mine, I like to call it a sophisticated cat kiss. Mind you my cat isn’t a kissy slutty cat, no no he only kisses a very special select few.

3. When I go back home to my parents in the fresh air county I love to call Devon, my cat on the first night of arrival likes to sing to me outside my window for hours and hours, Its cute at first because I know he is singing in his best voice, but after 3 hours, water will hit his tabby coat.

4. When I get dressed, my cat doesn’t look at me with those pervy eyes that dogs look at you with, but instead looks at me like I am the most beautiful perfect women on the planet. I tell you what, every woman should get a cat to make them feel better about their body hang ups, just one look from those eyes and that cat will get any treat he likes, you name it tinned salmon, waitrose kitty food, or even some cut from the bone ham. After I get dressed and my Cat looks at me with those ‘Your amazing kind of eyes’ I normally treat him with a nice bowl of green lid milk slightly warmed up.

5. Finally I love my cat because, he is loyal and always comes home, he gives the best hugs when your down, and looks after my other cat Mia and the tortoise tank Martha (Mums Birthday present, she loves it like a fucking human) like a good big brother.

Ps, If you have a cat you have to try them on catnip, the best experience of my life, he loved that shit!